An Evening that Went to the Dogs

This past Saturday was an evening that went to the dogs--but it was actually a good thing. LARAS House held their 4th annual "Spay-ghetti and Nooders" banquet at the Groesbeck, TX civic center, and it was a doggone success.

My youngest sister, who serves on the LARAS House board, invited me to be the keynote speaker at the banquet. She knew that I loved dogs and, being a preacher, felt that I could probably come up with something to say. I was billed as a "humorist," but a more accurate description might have been "Man with Twisted Sense of Humor."

A few hours before the banquet, Sis took me out to the LARAS House facility, located in nearby Mexia, TX. I was greeted by happy barks and wagging tails. I also got to meet the doggies who went to New York last October to particpate in Animal Planet's "Puppy Bowl."

That night, over 200 people filed in to buy tickets and review silent auction items before the dinner and program. Local politicians wandered the floor soliciting donations in big buckets and wearing signs such as "Captain K9" and "Big Chief Hot Dog." We heard a heartwarming adoption story and then it was time for the "Humorist" to take center stage.

I opened by asking if the "spay-ghetti and nooders" were prepared or fixed.Then I went on to make a confession that there were more pictures of my dogs on Facebook than of my kids. My sister was operating a  projector, flashing images of the four Winter rescue canines on a screen as I told funny stories of how my wife and I got each one of them. I also imitated a cat responding to a LARAS House post entitled, "You May Be the Purr-fect Cat Owner If You..."

One of the qualificiations was, "You don't mind having your ankles rubbed by an affectionate, hairy animal." The cat's reply? Or shredded; makes no difference to moi.

As I neared the end of my talk, I urged the audience to keep fighting the good fight, promoting responsible pet ownership through spaying and neutering. Then I ended with this beautiful haiku, written from the perspective of a pet:

I am your best friend.

Now, always and especially

When you are eating.